In Love with You

It’s really a nice feeling when someone says to us that he/she falling in love with us. It’s like there is someone out there who appreciated us just the way we are. But have we ever consider to say the same exact words to ourselves? I like to think how feeling appreciated our soul is when he/she finally hear from your mouth, “I love you. I am in love with you.”


Recently, people think to loving themselves means being selfish. It is not like that. When we love ourselves, it makes us know exactly what we wanna do or what we don’t want to do. It’s also help us to take boundaries to negative things that will harm ourselves because we love us.


I think, ignorant with oneself is a sign of how careless someone is. Just like human relationship, we also need to build relationship with oneself. We need to stop sometimes from our busy life and look into the mirror, saying the true words how we love ourselves. How we fall in love with everything that happened and occurred in this vulnerable human being. It’s not an ordinary situation, how we can born to this world – against lots of lots our competitors before we were staying in our mom’s womb, what happened to us, how do we look, what we experienced, our personality, that’s all also not an ordinary things. Just like the common words you might often hear everywhere; you are unique. That’s true. Each of us are unique. That’s why each of us, finding chemistry not to everyone, but only to special people that we feel connected with. Because we feel he/she has a difference quality than what we have, and we feel interest on it and feel more alive to face the different. If all of us have same character, same personality, same appearance, there will be not interesting anymore to connected with another people.


I used to think nothing about appreciate my own soul, my own body. I used to think, “Well, I grow up like this. Well, this is my eyes, my mouth, my ears, my hands, all just happened as normal it should be.” But actually it is not. All the part of our body and our soul still able to working well already such a miracle and achievement to us. Some of us tend to look more to people who are smarter than us, prettier than us, muscular than us, rather than looking to people who is unfortunate than us. If we would like to take a walk to slum roads, to normal roads, not only watching Television or go to huge mall whose fill our mind with fancy things and fancy people, if we would like to drop ourselves to the corner of the city, to it’s garden, to the market, to the silent town, when we might realized many people are lacking in need than us.


I have this confusion feeling with our generation lately. People post their nude body so easily in social media. Even teenagers now just openly showing their special area in public where thousand people can see it easily. I see it how competition between women and men, to showing off their “things” and labelled it as “grateful.” Maybe their genuine purpose is to show how grateful they are with their body. But loving yourself is not like that. You don’t need to show to the world how “sexy” you are to get people attention. Or showing how great your life is in purpose to make people look at you. That IMHO, is insecurity rather than being grateful for what you are. But I might wrong in it. Maybe some people really do that in case to show their thank about the life they have. But I always think, the more you show to people how pretty you are, how sexy you are, how rich you are, actually you are just cover up yourself with such fake image to get instant popularity. And after that, what? Do you think you can define yourself by that popularity. Define your value or how the way you see yourself. No, loving yourself is not like that. It’s beyond that. It’s more than just showing off in social media.


For what I see, social media lately becomes such a mess up in human life. It causes the competition between people to show to the world, “Hey, I have better life than her/him! I am sexier than them” For me, I am a bit conventional about it, if you really love your body that much, you better just show it to someone who is special to you, rather than show it in front of thousand or million strangers who probably use your stuff in wrong way. This phenomena develop another insecurities to one and another. People will think, “Oh that’s mean beauty. I should do the same.” And they will curse themselves because they don’t think they are prettier than that fancy people. Teenagers will curse their parents, cause can not give them a life like what their friends have. People curse their own self because they think they are ugly – not meet the “world standard” of being handsome or being pretty. That’s sad.


Loving yourself is about being ok with your own self. You know exactly you have flaws, you have weakness, but you didn’t deny it. You didn’t ignore it. You don’t defense with it as saying this cliche words “Let me be myself.” Because “Be yourself,” can have double meaning. People can use it for ignorance or for good act. You work on it. You accept your weakness or the fact that you still need to be improve in this and that part, but you don’t see as a final point. You work on it, you try your best to diminish your weakness, even it’s difficult and takes time. You learn how to be a better person. That’s make you a real human.


Human is human. Human is not a dead Barbie. Human also not a dead Ken. Barbie and Ken created by giant factory. We are created by miracles and consist with lots of beautiful and not so beautiful things (to be honest) but it’s ok. Remember, that’s what make us unique. So stop for a while now, look at the mirror, put your hands to your heart and say how grateful you are to have your body, your soul, your personality, even you know that you have lots of flaws, but you are the product of grace, built by such a miracle. Say thanks to your body and don’t compare yourself with another, because you are unique. Each of us unique. And go falling in love with yourself. When you genuinely love yourself, you can do lots of things more than you can imagine.


Dea Sihotang



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